When most people picture a room set up for a baby, they probably think of something like this:
Swings, bouncy seats, jumping chairs, activity mats...
All of this equipment serves two purposes: safety and entertainment. We think we have to keep babies safe by keeping them contained, and of course they get bored just sitting there so we have to have motion, lights, music, buttons, etc. to keep them entertained.
But what if I told you that all of these common additions to your baby registry are wholly unnecessary?
What if I told you that baby boredom is something we create, not something we have to alleviate?
In their natural state, babies are never bored. Think about it, the whole world is brand-spanking new to them. Everything they see is exciting and interesting. It's only when we prime them to expect constant adult-led entertainment and more and more over-stimulating toys that beep and light up and play music that we begin to see baby burn-out.
There's a better way...
An alternative approach is to spend your time and energy preparing your home for the baby to freely explore and discover (and this does not look like following the baby around the house and stopping them from touching anything sharp, delicate or toxic). This means providing spaces where they do not require full supervision - or any supervision for brief periods of time - and gating or blocking off the rest of the home.
I encourage parents to fully “baby proof” their homes, not for fear that their child will get hurt (although of course that’s important too), but rather to give their baby the gift of freedom. Every time you have to stop a baby from touching something, not only do you stifle their endeavors, you also make the contraband item all the more enticing. Instead, put things away, lock them up, be mindful of little hands and mouths yearning to try everything. Let the environment set the limits for you.
Now, I’m not suggesting that it’s wrong or harmful for a baby to hear the word “no.” Of course there will be things or places they encounter that are
dangerous and require intervention. I’m just saying that those interventions should be fairly rare and saved for the really important stuff. The more you can eliminate the need to redirect them, the better they will respond when you need to do so.
So what do I mean by “fully” baby proofing? Stick foam guards on every corner? Remove all furniture from their playroom? Put them in full body bubble wrap? No. Your child will have some minor injuries as they gain mobility. Learning to fall is an important part of learning to walk and risk-taking is not something to be stifled, as long as you properly prepare.
Lock up the chemicals, put away sharp, breakable or heavy objects, close bathroom doors and gate off the kitchen if you can. But just as it’s a bad idea to follow them around and protect them from every possible ouchie, it’s also problematic to overly “pad” their world. Give them a safe space, a “yes” space where everything is allowed but all risks are not completely removed.
And then watch them blossom as they explore and bite your tongue every time you feel the urge to say “be careful!”
Comments